About Me

My photo
I'm a 29 year old self identifying hippie and amateur photographer. I've been married since Summer 2006, and we started trying to get pregnant the summer of 2007, I have 2 cats and a dog, and I work as a secretary in a prison. This blog is about my battle with infertility and life, love, faith and happiness in the face of infertility. All pictures in the collage and those that I post in my entries were taken by me, unless otherwise stated (or if they are of me of course). Come visit my photography page to see more of my work here: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hannah-Love-Chandlers-Photography/282550090053

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Smiling My Way Through Infertility

There are a lot of little things in life that make me happy. Any time I can glean a little bit of joy from something, no matter how small, I jump at the chance. For a person battling infertility it is a daily struggle to keep their spirits high. I make it a point to enjoy my life and find little things I can achieve some happiness from. Some days it helps soften the blow of infertility. Here is a list of things that make me happy or bring a smile to my face.

Funky socks make me happy. Any socks that are not plain white are good, but if they are any bright color, have several colors or funky designs they were made for my feet. Putting them on and seeing them all day make me smile, and every smile is a step in the right direction.

Rainbows, obviously. Rainbows are beautiful. They are a rare occurrence (though not in Hawaii, one of the reasons I love Hawaii), and they are so hard to find and to capture. Even when I do get a picture of a rainbow it never shows up as splendid in my picture as it did in real life.

Nail polish. Putting a new fresh coat of bright colors nail polish on my nails makes me smile. I hate when I am not allowed to have my nails painted and in those situations (when I worked at McDonald’s) I rebel by wearing nail decals over clear polish. My favorite nail polish of all time is a bright purple that is called ‘Let’s Talk’ for some reason. It is so bright and deep that it draws my attention during the day and brings a smile to my face every time.

Rain. I love it when it rains. I don’t mean when it drizzles or sprinkles all day, those days are a little depressing. I mean when it Rains with a capital ‘R’. I love it when it starts pouring rain, and thunder and lightning are the whipped cream and cherry on my rainy day. When it starts pouring down rain I want to run outside and stand under my carport and watch the rain, and I am tempted to run right out into it. Many times I just open the shades and the curtains and watch the rain from the inside, but I love it any time it pours, any way I can see it.

A good book. I LOVE to read. I like to take long bubble baths when I have extra time, and I always read while in the bath, I always have a book with me so that I can read on my breaks at work, I read while I eat lunch, and I keep a book on hand so that any time I have to wait somewhere I have a book to read. My favorite author is Dean Koontz, with Patricia Cornwell and James Patterson tied for second. My husband just turned me on to the Harry Dresden Series by Jim Butcher, which is about a wizard for hire in modern day Chicago. I also love many of the Christian series’ written by Robin Jones Gunn. My favorite book not written by any of these authors, and one of my favorites of all time is called The Arena and it is by Karen Hancock. The other things she has written don’t sound like anything I would be interested in, but the first time I read this book in high school I was SAD when it ended. Not because the ending was sad, but because I couldn’t keep reading it. I borrowed it from the library a couple times after that and got my husband and one of my mom’s friends to read it, and then when we moved I borrowed it from the library in my new town as well, in fact I think they had to borrow it from another library just so I could get it. I eventually bought it from Amazon.com with some Amazon gift cards I had saved up, and now I have my very own copy I can read as many times as I want. There are only a few books that I want to read more than three or four times, and this one is one on that short list. I encourage anybody who likes to read to borrow or buy The Arena by Karen Hancock. Another book on that list is by Dean Koontz, called Twilight Eyes. I also recently bought this one with Amazon gift cards, and I read it as soon as I got it only a few months ago, and started it again yesterday. I like reading most books multiple times, but I usually wait a long time in between reads so that I can forget some of what happens and it is interesting to me the third or fourth time around, but not this one and not The Arena.

That brings me to my next point, photography. I love taking pictures of everything. I love taking scenic shots of waterfalls, creeks, fall trees, lakes, the ocean, snow, and winding roads… I also love taking pictures of babies and little kids, of my family (even the grown ones), and of pets and other animals. Every time I take a picture that turns out as well as I hoped it brings me some joy in life. I can look at those pictures and remember the beauty that I have seen. I love posting my pictures online and I hope those pictures bring a little bit of joy to those who view them. I put the link to my photography page on Facebook in my first blog, but I will post it again here. http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/pages/Hannah-Love-Chandlers-Photography/282550090053

My husband makes me laugh and smile multiple times a day. Sometimes even when I am a little mad at him he can make me laugh. Last night he took hot dog buns out of the bag and then left the bag open on the counter. I didn’t notice until a couple hours after dinner, but when I did I twisted the bag closed and then I went and told him that he needs to make sure to close the bag so the hot dog buns don’t get stale. He hardly uses the hot dog buns because they aren’t wheat buns, so leaving them open wasn’t going to affect him; it was going to affect me. So last night when I am telling him to make sure to close that bag when he’s done he starts looking behind him saying: “I don’t know who you are talking to, but that guy is in trouble.” I followed him in the living room and he goes: “I don’t know why you’re following me, that guys the one that did it,” pointing back in the kitchen. He just kept pointing behind him and away from him, and then he started acting like he was talking to the “guy” he was blaming it on. It made me laugh even when I was not happy that he had left the bag open.

My dog. My dog makes me smile every day with her antics. Getting her was a really great move on our part, from the decision to get a puppy to the puppy we chose from the litter. She is perfect for us and very lovable. We got her when we decided we needed to give and receive more love than our cats can give. Our cats are terrific and I have always been a cat person, but cats are different than dogs and babies, and dogs are usually a lot closer to babies than cats are. Both my husband and I have always preferred cats, and my husband has always referred to dogs as children that never grow up. This was a reason he always used to give for not getting a dog. But with our hopes for a baby continuing on unrealized, a puppy seemed like the answer. We have never regretted our decision to get a dog and we have been blessed to have her be part of our family.


  1. Don’t think of anything else just contact priest eka and purchase some of his herbal medication and your depression will go away. This was my state of mind when my doctor told me that i will not be able to concieve due to the Fibroid that was rolling in my family life and when i decide to reach out to the priest, and the priest told me what to do in other to get the medication. Eventually I receive all the Herbal medications that cure my Fibroid and give me the chance to become a proud mother: Eka is a great spiritualist, He did it for me, you can contact Eka on (dreka14demons@gmail.com). If you are suffering from the following gynecology disease::
    1. Fibroid, Asthma, All STD,
    2. High Blood Pressure (herbs to reduce your BP within 7days)
    3. Infection, regular body pains (yeast infection)
    4. Blockage from the fallopian Tube
    5. Cyst from the ovaries
    6. Unpleasant smell from the virginal, virginal itching
    7. Irregular menstruation
    8. Weakness of the penis (not able to have sex with your partner or inability to satisfy your partner sexually)
    9. Watering sperm (low sperm count) not able to get woman pregnant.
    10. Infertility for easy Conception.......
    11. Skin diseases, Toilet infection and bad body odor…….Etc..
    Simply contact the spiritualist Dr Eka on (dreka14demons@gmail.com) to get his Herbal Medication to cure your disease and put yourself on a motherhood side of life..

  2. The video presentation shows you some unique and rare tips on how to reverse almost any type of infertility disorder and get pregnant naturally in just 60 short days even if you're on your late 30's or 40's.

    This is based on the latest scientific research on how to stop the actual CAUSE of 97% of infertility disorders.

    For more info please click on the following link: infertility Causes Male Female and Treatment

    Talk soon